Praise Billith: The Racialicious True Blood Roundtable For 5.12

Alea: I actually do want to know what hell is in a “Cajun margarita,” and why does it taste like candy? Cajun flavors typically include black and cayenne peppers, bell pepper, [green] onion, parsley, bay leaf, and celery.  You can’t just call shit “Cajun” because it’s made in Louisiana.

Kendra: Ask and ye shall receive: 2 tbs. coarse salt, 1 lime wedge, 3 oz. white tequila, 1 oz. triple sec, 2 oz. fresh lime juice, 1/2 tsp. green Tabasco sauce, 1 cup crushed ice.

Uh, not that this would be anywhere near as pink as whatever Lafayette brewed up, but enjoy!

Alea: The color is indeed off and I still don’t understand why it’s anything like “candy.”

Tami: Dear Nelsan Ellis (aka Lafayette), you are doing too much. I love you, baby. But all the dipping, dialect, and general sassiness has taken a dangerous turn into Mammy territory. I know the writers gave you shit to work with this season, but seriously…stop it.

Alea: So. Much. Cosign.  The outfit, the lashes, the turban, the swag–all fierce, but can we have Laffy doing something besides making shit for white folks when Merlotte’s is closed?

Tami: Also, Arlene: “What is this music?” Come one, now. No way this woman is so culturally illiterate that classic R&B is some foreign exoticness.

Alea: Seriously, Miss Bodehouse.  Andy Bellefleur did get super hot this season. Looooove Maurella’s style.

Dr. Stackhouse Is In

Alea: New spinoff: Jason Stackhouse, Relationship Counselor.  He’ll be like a cross between Dr. Phil and Dan Savage with a dash of nihilism.

Alea: I am just realizing where I’ve seen the actress who plays Rosalyn Harris–General Hospital!

Tami: I would totally be down with having kids if you can guarantee me an experience like this.

Alea: So, wait.  The “Cajun margaritas” that were allegedly delicious are sitting on the bar mostly full and Ar-Laffy have moved on to shots?

Alea: I thought Alcide’s former/now-current pack was larger than this?  Where is everyone else?

Tami: Count JD as another character dispatched a little too easily. For all the angst this season, you would think we would at least see an actual fight.

Kendra: I’d like to think that the writers realised what I spent most of the season thinking: the plot drags whenever we suddenly switch over to the werewolf story, which has nothing at all to do with what’s going on in Bon Temps. So why spend any time there at all? I get that this is probably leading to some Alcide-as-a-V-addict-and-pack-leader storyline for next season, but not having it tie back in the end to Bon Temps in some way kind of leaves it just…hanging. Especially with Russell dead now.

Alea: Sam shifting inside of Rosalyn, FTW.  Luna threatened to out all of the other supes earlier in the season. The implications for her shifting on live television are going to be crazy.

Alea: Nora is some kind of stake-throwing Robin Hood.

Kendra: Well, the actress did play Maid Marian, hah.

Alea: Ah!  Very cool.

Move Over Brangelina And Make Room For Tam

Alea: I think Pam’s underwear evaporated when Tara said she came to bust her out.  Kristin Bauer can sure do a lot with her eyes.  They’re so gonna do it.

Alea: “Do you honestly think you understand the system I helped design better than I do?”–so timely and straight out of Rebecca Solnit’s “Men Explain Things to Me.”

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