This World Is Not Enough: The Racialicious Roundtable For True Blood 5.9

Alea: She looks rather unharmed for having been clocked in the head with a cast iron skillet.

Latoya: That villain speech from “Sweetie” was so unsatisfying.

Joe: The reason she’s a supernatural-ist is kind of lacking, too.

Alea: The entire hate group subplot felt unnecessary. There was some solid detective work done by Andy, Jason, Sam, and Luna, and both of the pairs got closer together, but if I wanted to see good sleuthing, I’d just watch Marple.

Latoya: That SWAT storm of Bud’s house looked just like a scene from Reno 911.

Joe: I mean, Bon Temps PD and Reno 911’s squad are pretty interchangable.

Carly: Speaking of the other police officers, how much is that one cop like the brother from In & Out ? And also, way to completely distract us from the fact we learned absolutely nothing new about Warlow. Anyone think that’ll be the cliffhanger for the season?

Alea: I hope not, but the ridiculous number of storylines this season makes it seem distinctly possible.

Tami: I need these shifters to quit changing into human form to fight. Why give Sweetie a naked beat down when you can just rip her throat out with her fangs? Ditto for naked Sam.

Gratuitous Aside #3Alea: Where can I buy whatever it is that Valentina Cervi is [barely] wearing? Also, Salome…is Lilith? Or has she just ingested so much of whatever’s in the alleged Lilith blood that she’s perma-tripping?

Just Wondering…Latoya: Will the writing get better if we ban the use of the words “bitch” and “fuck” next season? Because I swear like a sailor, but this is getting repetitive.

Carly: Amen to that.

Vampire Baby SnatchersLatoya: Oh, they snatched Emma. Why didn’t Martha get her wolf on? I am trying to care about this plot, but it ain’t working. Also, Joe, looks like your theory from last week is right. Russell + Steve it is.

Alea: That could be the best buddy comedy spin-off ever. I totally had visions of magic carpet rides and Russell singing “A Whole New World.”

Carly: I always find storylines like this bizarre, when something horrific is happening and no one stands up or acts against it. It’s a weird commentary on the group…I know about groupthink and all, but are all these vampire-addled V addicts that would give up one of their pack already?

Joe: I feel like they all knew that Russell could snap every one of them in half if he wanted to. I hope we get more Luna badassery leading to the demise of Russell (and Steve, too, probably) likely at the very very end of the season.

Carly: Hmmm, Luna v. Russell….That would be awesome but now that you say it, I’ll wager a Luna v. Steve showdown.

Alea: Steve’s definitely going to get it, but I’m not so sure about Russell. I mean, it makes sense for him to die, but the who and how are unclear at this point. As for the pack, it’s been heavily populated by shady, self-interested people since Marcus was packmaster. With V addiction and Russell’s strength added to the equation, there’s no way they’d defend Emma, JD, or any single individual.

Tami: That moment when Russell dropped his Mississippi gentleman facade and accent was exquisite–the best of the episode. I seriously want Denis O’Hare to appear in every show ever.

Latoya: What’s Alcide doing? Oh, wait, a wallow in pity subplot is rising. I really prefer the lone wolves in the Otherworld series. Why isn’t that a show yet? Kelley Armstrong just wrapped the series–now is totally the time.

WeirdAlea: Those faeries just….popped over to bring soup and watch the telly? I don’t know if I’d be so comfortable with letting such an unreliable bunch hang in my home.

And…Scene!Latoya: What was that awkward musical intro to Bill’s betrayal?

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