Everyone has an off week. After coming back from NABJ, I barely woke up in time for True Blood, and spent the episode confusedly blinking at the TV through a wine hangover haze. And this week went to hell thanks to the post-NABJ/pre-AAJA ramp up. (I’m finishing this from my busted laptop in Detroit.) But never fear! Amber, Kendra, Joe, Alea and Jordan took on the heavy lifting.
Amber: Hopefully they expand on black woman ghost/angel tonight. I just got way more interested in this Terry and Arlene storyline.
Latoya: @Amber -right? But we are probably stuck with Sookie/Eric. Soeric? Ekie?
Amber: Lol. She did only make a brief appearance.
Latoya: Antonia is running shit.
Alea: I cannot believe that Luis would even approach her after what she did to Eric and Pam. Vampires acting way too hastily is totally one of the themes of this season.
Joe: It seems that girls who look like Evan Rachel wood don’t have too much luck on this show.
Kendra: I kind of feel bad for Marnie so far. classic case of messing with ish you have no business trying to control.
Jordan: Yeah, they messed with the wrong witch on that one
Amber: Agreed. There’s just no way Marnie is going to make it out of this OK.
Latoya : @Kendra- Yeah, she should have watched the craft
Jordan: Not feeling bad for Marnie so much as I feel like Antonia gave her plenty of time to back out and everyone around her was screaming warnings at her. I just feel like she didn’t have proper respect for the power she wanted and the cost.
Tara Escapes Death Again
Jordan: ummm.. why does everyone have to bring up Tara’s gf is Asian?
Alea: “Yellowtail” is absolutely uncalled for, though Pam’s racism is probably the cleverest of anyone’s on the show.
Kendra: wow, she’s knocking pieces of her skull off.
Amber: Tara is not playin around.
Jordan: OHHHHH Pam is going to meeting the true death
Alea: That makes me so sad. Be smart, Pammy!
Kendra: Yeah, the plot description for this is, “Bill has to issue an order that makes him uncomfortable” on my tv guide thing. Maybe that’s it.
Amber: Sounds like it. What a way for Pam to go out…damn.
Amber: Now we all know that they should just start the car and go on back to NOLA…
Alea: That would be the smart thing to do.
Latoya: Welp, Tara is correct. She’s gotta dust Pam.
Amber: Aw, this is sad. Tara just really isn’t allowed to be happy. Womp.
Kendra: Well, girlfriend has spunk at least. She’ll be making her own choices, thanks.
Alea: [I still cannot get over how bad girlfriend’s acting is.]
Kendra: Oh, or not.
Latoya : Damn Tara.
Jordan: I’m sorry, why can’t Tara leave again?
Latoya: The strong black woman stereotype must come to fruition.
Alea: Because she can’t be allowed to have one moment of happiness in this entire damn series.
Kendra: I really just want her to move to Chicago or something. Nola was apparently too damn close.
Jordan: I mean seriously, why is saving everyone her problem
Amber: Yeah, I also don’t really understand why she can’t leave. She should still make moves and handle her own business for once. C’mon, Tara.
Latoya: @Kendra – I say a new country might hlp.
Alea: Tara would never be allowed that much freedom before being chased down by the Bon Temps Drama Llama. Also, damn. Handstand push-ups are hard.
Jordan: Oh damn Tara
Alea: What the fuck is she doing? Walking around in the woods alone drunk is better than going back to New Orleans with one’s hot mixed martial artist girlfriend? Why do they refuse to let her be a real person for more than two seconds?
Kendra: And why do we keep seeing her make the same damn mistakes?
Amber: Toting a bottle though?
Latoya: Ooooooh Tara, just drinking yourself to death again?
Kendra: At least it’s like half a weapon.
Amber: Drunk and paranoid. What a combination…
Latoya: Is Tara better off with Pam or with Antonia?
Kendra: Okay. If Tara agrees to work with this woman… Does she NOT remember MaryAnne?
Amber: I don’t even know how Tara can protect herself in this situation…
Alea: Is Tara ever allowed to protect herself in any situation? She’s never allowed to make the best decision for her long-term well-being.
Jordan: Yeah… I know Tara’s mad and all but let’s not fight undead crazy with back from the dead crazy.
Kendra: I’m thinking not.
Jordan: Oh Tara, why didn’t you ride off in the night with your chick?
Amber: Geeeze, Tara.
Kendra: Why, Tara, why? And why are you dragging this nice lady into it?
Amber: It was just way too easy to recruit Tara to be a part of this cause.
Kendra: I honestly just would have thought, that given Maryanne, she would have thought twice.
Joe: I don’t think she’s the kind of person that takes her time with decisions.
Jordan: Why is Tara being the evil lackey… again…
Alea: Because Ball has no other use for black people?
Latoya: Yeah, time to dust off that Tara obit,
Amber: Sometimes you just need to leave town and leave the fighting for someone else.
Alea: Tara’s brief flirtation with a sense of self-preservation has disappeared.
Jordan: Yeah, I don’t like that they always make her the fighter. or the loser. she’s never at peace and happy
Amber: …Or the victim.
Latoya: This is some Craft shit. No good will come of this.
Kendra: Tara’s been drinking Sookie’s water, because this is just a dumb move.
Amber: Tara is foolish for this one.
Alea: She drank the Kool-Aid.
Jordan: Yeah, she should know better than siding with a woman who is back from the dead
Latoya: She normally has more sense than this. Then again, she felt like a walking dead woman. And she was drunk
Amber: Truth, but sober Tara didn’t seem to need much convincing either.
Jordan: Not the smartest bunch these two
Kendra: This is not news Laffy wants to hear.
Latoya: Jesus has a family history of omission and manipulation
Alea: Motherfucker is sketch as hell.
Jordan: Oh I don’t know about Laffy being a medium… that never ends well
Amber : I hope there more to his “magic” than just that.
Joe: However, take note, Lafayette and Marnie/Antonia are the only ones that have so far. Yin and Yang!
Latoya: Debbie is gonna get Alcide killed.
Alea: And she’s not even smart enough to do it on purpose.
Kendra: I feel like we don’t know enough about Debbie aside from the fact that she’s a reformed V addict. I’d like more from the writers.
Amber: Well, it does look like they are actually exploring and developing a lot of the other storylines tonight. 11 min in and we still haven’t seen Eric and Sookie. I am not complaining.
Alea: Now that they’re all in lurve, they’ve got just the worst dialogue.
Jordan: Debbie is caring the “speaking sense” mantle tonight. Oh wait… she just put it down
Amber Jones: Oh….here are Eric and Sookie…ugh.
Latoya: “Can’t you smell her?” Damn Alcide. Does Sookie need a visit from a talking handgina?
Kendra: This is why we haven’t seen them. Too busy.
Amber : Yep. I spoke too soon.
Kendra: Okay, this is a sex scene I’m more interested in.
Latoya: Debbie is banana creme pie. And I guess wolves like spolied wheat.
Jordan: I’m sorry if you have to talk about another woman when you are with a man that looks like that, it’s a wrap
Latoya: @Jordan – girl, we know Debbie ain’t all the way right
Latoya: Clearly, Antonia’s message to Beel was “fuck you.”
Jordan: Bill just ruined his new office furniture… and after all that time redecorating
Alea: I’m sure they’ve got a thing or two at the manse for spot-cleaning innards.
Jordan: Oh… the waves of backstory are killing me… let’s move it along
Amber: Lol. Bill is loving the role of storyteller.
Alea: It’s totally a ghost story.
Amber: It’s as if he rehearsed it. “Once upon a time, long long ago…”
Latoya: has totally upgraded his wardrobe. @Amber – yeah that last line was ridic.
Latoya: Wait, Hoyt is bubba? LULZ.
Joe: A nod to the books, maybe? Since the Bubba character is replaced by Jessica? An upgrade in my opinion
Latoya: Uh oh. Vampire business.
Kendra: Woah, real talk, Hoyt. That makes you and Tara the only ones willing to call rape what it is.
Alea: Hoyt is such a stand-up guy. Only bad things will happen to him.
Kendra: (side note: I was so disappointed when Jason didn’t turn last week…)
Amber: @Kendra I was too. I’m still hopeful. * fingers crossed *
Joe: Maybe he’s still ripening.
Alea: Something about the word “ripening” in this context is unsettling for me.
Jordan: yeah… what was that all about… I am sitting there waiting for Jason to turn and then… nothing…
Kendra: …………..What. Is. This. Even.
Joe: Seriously? They had a sexwalk home?
Kendra: I think the worst part is I’m just LAUGHING at them.
Latoya: I hope the Sookie/Eric shippers are happy
Joe: I was, and now I feel like I’m watching Passions. Sheridan and Luis 2.0.
Alea: “Are they still fucking? I’m so over this.” — Viewing Companion, No. 1 [I was never a Passions fan — more of a General Hospital girl, myself — but +1 on the soap opera reference.]
Latoya: This shit is clogging up the show.
Joe: They do realize that Sookie’s boobs aren’t hiding how incredibly corny this is, right?
Latoya: Fuck. No Angelus time here
Kendra: @Latoya, I’m okay with that– only because of the blatant “consequences of sex” morality lesson in that…
Latoya: He’s listening to your heart so he can eat it.
Amber Jones: Ha.
Jordan St.John: What… I don’t think Eric was ever this corny, even when he was human… who is this pathetic stereotype of a man?
Alea: We don’t really know, though, what Eric was like before he stopped being young and innocent.
Latoya: Sookie, you stay stupid.
Jordan: Who wants Eric back…I DO. Please Eric, return to us in your former glory. Remember who you are Eric, REMEMBER!
Kendra: No she doesn’t.
Amber : Please remember!
Kendra: Key words there Sookie, “you did a lot of terrible things to me.”
Latoya: …Clearly, him doing terrible things didn’t stop you from fucking him Sook.
Jordan: What?! He killed people when he was his “sweet” self
Amber: See how quickly she forgets?
Jordan: She is the worst kind of dumb
Alea: Sookie is kind of like your typical American. No historical memory or sense of self-preservation, which leads to some poor-ass decision-making for the future.
Amber: I think I prefer Eric in the flannel over the b-ball shorts.
Joe: Lumberjack Viking and Layup Viking.
Alea: Lol, and absolutely. I looooove flannel.
Jordan: ditto. but I miss Eric’s real clothes
Jordan: When Is the Real Eric coming back!!!!
Alea: Being chained in the basement with Daddy Bill seems like the perfect time for some co-counseling.
Amber: Bill is sounding pretty Godric-esque.
Jordan: Doesn’t Sookie have a damn job?
Kendra: Tommy fired her. As Sam should’ve done ages ago.
Jordan: Shouldn’t she get another then?
Alea: She doesn’t need one. Eric’s going to take care of her forever and ever and ever.
Amber: Tommy fired her with such gusto! It was definitely one of my fave scenes last week.
Kendra: Also she keeps getting money from vampires and werewolves. Sigh.
Joe: She’s like an independent contractor.
Jordan: Someone put me out of the misery of their conversations
Amber: Not thinking is what gets you in trouble Sook. I’m just sayin.
Jordan: Get a job Sookie! Get a life.
Alea: Even then you would have died for me?!?! Really?!?
Kendra: Oh. Oh. Grooooooss.
Amber: Damn, Pam.
Joe: I thought that was a seaweed wrap. Guess it was her skin?
Alea: Damn. I bet that Pam hasn’t really felt this much consistent and visceral pain in a while. It’s making her so much more cranky than usual.
Joe: They frankly are reaching new heights of EW with this Pam rotting storyline.
Jordan: Oh Pam…
Kendra: So when does Tommy confess his sins?
Amber: So, how big do we think the fallout will be? Smdh.
Jordan: These two… they are all kinds of strange. I don’t know how their family relationship works
Alea: It doesn’t.
Kendra: Admittedly, Bill and Jess’ relationship is probably one of my faves.
Joe: They do have a cute Father Daughter dynamic.
Amber: They do. It’s adorable. They’ve definitely come a long way.
Amber: I’m still trying to decide if this plan of Bill’s is a good one.
Kendra: Granted, I’m kind of wondering why they’re not just doing it over their clothing. Wouldn’t it have the same effect?
Joe: I thought the same thing to myself, and it’s probably kind of like handcuffs in that you can slide out of them easier. Also, vamps love being dramatic.
Kendra: Let’s get Pam’s makeup people an Emmy, please.
Alea: +1. It’s brilliant work.
Jordan: Poor Pam
Amber: Just pain all over the place.
Jordan: I love her… I know she’s evil but I love Pam
Kendra: I adore her pink princess coffin.
Alea: Me, too! It’s so at odds with the rest of her aesthetic sensibilities. I don’t know if I would have pegged her for a pretty pretty princess on the inside.
Amber: LOL @ the “fuck me” bahaha
Latoya: OH SHIT NO JESSICA
Jordan: Jessica is determined that one
Alea: She has all of the strength and foolishness of the young.
Joe: It must be a plot point that witches can circumvent makers’ commands. That’s something else.
Amber: Did she just ignore her maker…?
Kendra: Aaw, Jason to the rescue…
Amber: This is deep.
Latoya: OMG JASON
Latoya: OMG NPOOOOOOOOOO
Kendra: Good ending
Amber: If she makes it out, that’s going to add SO MUCH fuel to their love story.
Alea: There’s no way that Jason isn’t going to save her.
Jordan: Jessica…. NOOOOOOOOOO
Amber: Great ending. * applause *
Joe: I’m tearing up. I’m just going to admit it.
Latoya Peterson: @Amber _ I will appreciate in a sec. but right now : OMG JESSICA!!!!
Amber: Hahahaha. Go on…let it out.
Jordan: Yes, nice ending. Once Eric comes back and they stop raping people, we may be on track
Kendra: Aside from the gratutious sookie/erik that was a pretty good ep.
Kendra: Black ghost woman in the promo.
Latoya: Sookie vs. Tara!
Jordan: Ghost woman
Latoya: fuck I’m still sleepy
Amber: So anxious to learn ghost woman’s story.
Jordan: Yeah, something with the baby. Is she Rene’s ancestor?
Amber: It’s seeming more and more likely that she’s related to or is a guardian for the baby.
Jordan: Yeah, she was speaking french to the child and seems to have a connection
Amber: I think it’s safe to say that she’s benevolent. At least I’ve chosen to believe that until proven otherwise.
Amber: I’m getting those vibes.
Latoya: Benevolence ain’t always what it seems
Jordan: Yeah… i don’t know what her deal is yet
Kendra: I know she’s connected to Laffy, but par of me thinks she has something to do with creepy baby doll
Amber: It’s interesting that Laffy can see her.
Jordan: Laffy seems to have opened himself to a lot of spirits lately
Joe: Theory time! My guess is this ghost woman might be the foil to Antonia Gavilán of Logroño (yeah google!) once she goes too far off the deep end of course. Which I think we just witnessed.
Kendra: I feel like I missed the part of the episode when they got back to Bon Temps… Jesus didn’t show again.
Amber: Yeah, that was pretty random. Laffy just showed up in the kitchen.
Alea: Indeed. And there wasn’t really any mention of the other black man who took his place while he was in Mexico.
Latoya: Sorry, my brain is still going “OOOOOOOOOOOH JESSICA!”
Jordan: yeah, I am not sure where the two of them stand
Kendra: I had assumed that restaurant they were at was still Mexico. Oh well.
Alea: Me, too, but I guess Jarritos are everywhere.
Amber: I didn’t realize they were done with brujo. It didn’t really seem like that was completely resolved.
Kendra: yeah, exactly.
Kendra: And I had kind of assumed that the pregnant woman down in Mexico would, uh, DO something?
Jordan: I don’t think it is. Jesus seems to be pulling Laffy into a lot without giving him all the details
Alea: True. He didn’t even tell Laffy that he was a medium.
Amber: I’m wondering if they will end up having a significant role in the coven and this vampire war.
Jordan: and what about Pam, someone needs to fix her… I want her and Eric back to normal
Amber: Yeah I miss old Pam and Eric. Although Pam is still pretty entertaining. Eric has lost me though.
Kendra: Well, I’m pretty resigned to Pam’s death now… those six shots smh
Alea: I wonder what those were.
Jordan: I would like Tara to get her head right too
Kendra: Doesn’t look like it from the promo. I’d be happy if the GF shows up again.
Alea: Eh, I feel no attachment to her beyond her hotness. She’s merely a vehicle for Tara to move out of Bon Temps.
Amber: Foolish Tara definitely came out of no where. She’s had such a good head all season.
Alea: I don’t know about that. She started this season living a lie.
Jordan: Yeah… they seem in love with making her mean, tortured and miserable and Sookie unbearable
Latoya: Tara seems in over her head. (OMG Jess. OMG Hoyt! OMG Jason!)
Kendra: her descent into supporting all the witchcraft stuff came quick. Remember at the beginning of the season when she was scoffing in the corner?
Amber: Yep. That’s what doesn’t make much sense. She was skeptical about witchcraft from the beginning, but just seemed to plunge right into this war cause. She was hardly even suspicious about Marnie’s possession.
Jordan: yeah, her and Sookie seem to have lost their sense somewhere along the way
Amber: @Jordan Everyone seems to lose their sense in Bon Temps at some point.
Kendra: Except for Terry– who did not feature nearly enough tonight.
Latoya: Okay, we need eulogies for Jess.
Joe: Damnit. It’s always my favorite characters that get the short end of the stick. I mean, Pam looks like an embryo, Lafayette is being haunted and possessed and; the absolute nicest of all the vampires might turn into a kabob.
Jordan: Ha. True. Everyone seems to be taking this whole possession lightly… if a woman is back from the dead and in someone else’s body, I would think that her power is something I want nothing to do with
Joe: Oo Oo! Theory #2! I bet Jason takes this opportunity to turn into a panther to run to Jessica in time. I’m already swooning.
Latoya: @Jordan – Yes. How much of the Craft is on YouTube?
Amber: Is no one thinking “So, uh…where’s Marnie then…?”
Alea: No one cares.
Joe: See, that’s just too much sense for these characters, Amber.
Jordan: I know… everyone is really low key
Latoya: I think tara’s fear revealed that they didn’t quite get the plan
Kendra: No– no one was expecting the floating witch.
Alea: But I think that they were still into it. Power-hunger is wreaking havoc in BT.
Kendra: I’m just surprised Tara didn’t think ahead. She’s worried about Pam and Erik being pissed now– is she not thinking about what the consequences are going to be when they find out she worked with them on this.
Kendra: Sookie’s gonna have herself a little anuerysm, *snrk*
Jordan: hahaha… the only thing I am okay with is seeing Sookie’s reaction
Amber: Tara’s hoping Eric and Pam will get caught up in “the resurrection” and she won’t have to think about consequences.
Latoya: LOLSookie. Clearly, we all know she’s gonna choose Eric over Tara
Amber: She’s done it before.
Joe: To be honest though, Tara isn’t so much in the right with to be chosen over a teddy bear with fangs. If it were me I’d use this opportunity to put my house on the market and move away. I bet we have a high and mighty speech from Sookie to Tara about all this when she finds out though.
Jordan: And she doesn’t even like the real Eric, she is mooning over Fake, defanged, twilight Eric
Amber: Sookie has a short memory.
Kendra: Yeah, that’s weird to me. How do you outright tell someone that only want to sleep with them while they have amnesia?
Jordan: I hope real Eric casts her aside
Amber: * fingers crossed * Although, remembering that Fae blood will def keep him around.
Jordan: He would sip her like a drink and then go about his business helping Pam saving saving himself
I actually think it’d be hilarious if he calls her out for her shit when he gets his memories back– though in the books he doesn’t remember anything, post events.
Jordan: Yeah I remember that but I was all into this part in the books… so disappointed…