Racialicious Says Farewell to Carmen Van Kerckhove
When I started reading Mixed Media Watch/Racialicious in 2006, I marvelled at this Carmen Van Kerckhove person. Who was this woman, and how was she so cool? Carmen was like the digital representation of everything I wanted to be as an anti-racist writer. Then, when I finally got to meet Carmen in the flesh two years later, I couldn’t believe it when she hugged me and said how excited she was to meet me. (And then I almost fell out of my chair when Latoya asked me to join Racialicious, but that’s another story) I think what is most special about Carmen is not her mind-boggling social media skills, or her concise, sharp and seemingly effortless critiques of race and pop culture, (and these are mighty powers) but how she manages to stay so affectionate and enthusiastic as a person throughout. We will miss you Carmen, and we are proud to carry on the work you started – both its super-smarts and its warmth.
Latoya Peterson:
It’s rare that one email can change your life. Four years ago, pissed off and isolated in a small, all white town as part of a work assignment, I googled something about race and stumbled upon the Addicted to Race podcast. I quickly fell in love with segments like racial spy and enjoyed frank, interesting conversations about the state of race in America. Over time, ATR became part of my regular listening. I even bought a hot-pink ATR tee-shirt, which I wore proudly (and alienated some co-workers with, but that’s the story for another day.) As a regular listener, it was a bit amusing to listen to Carmen and Jen struggle to talk about the struggles of black women. After one episode filled with “I thinks” and “maybe black women might feels,” I shot off an email basically saying that if she was struggling writing about black women, there were resources she could tap. Carmen responded to the email, and asked me to come on board as one of the first special correspondents to her revamped website, Racialicious.
And ever since then, my life has been kind of a whirlwind of chaos. But every step of the way was Carmen, smoothing out the path and keeping me close to the calmer eye of the storm. Over the years, I’ve watched her go through so much to do this kind of work. Anti-racism, like so many social justice initiatives, is difficult to maintain without burning out. I cringed watching Carmen being attacked, learning she had her own special section on a white supremacist site, watching as people dismissed her work time and time again for the crime of having a white last name, who she dates, what she looks like – anything but the actual ideas. A common sentiment was along the lines of “What does some little Asian girl know about race?” But Carmen is visionary, and her mission was always clear – that it was time for a new type of conversation about race, one that looked at a multitude of perspectives, that was inclusive but never apologetic, that focused on accessibility and conversation. And I was down with that mission.
But more than just vision, Carmen is a great friend. Kind of like the older sister you always wanted, Carmen was always there with a listening ear, a kind word, or a well placed “Dude, fuck that shit and stop worrying so much.” It was Carmen who pushed me to get my work published in some sort of paying media outlet. I still remember the “fight” we had over a piece, where she refused to publish it since she thought I should get paid for it, and I refused to send it out because I wanted to have it on Racialicious. It is because of Carmen that I am a paid, working writer, something I had never thought would be possible. Later, when she turned over the editing of the site to me, and let me put my own mark on Racialicious, adding new contributors and a different style, which was controversial at the time – but Carmen had nothing but faith. It was Carmen who pushed me to start speaking, to build my own identity outside of Racialicious, to figure out what I wanted and needed out of life. It was Carmen who talked me down from the ledge when I wanted to quit blogging for good after a piece I wrote became an online nightmare, and it was Carmen who ultimately blurred the lines of boss, mentor, and friend.
In many ways, Carmen was instrumental in leading and shaping the lives of young activists like myself and challenging us to be our personal best. So, I know how many of you are feeling right now.
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