Identity Crises: The Racialicious Review of ‘Heroes’ 4.1 + 4.2
By Special Correspondent Arturo R. García
Heroes’ season premiere was two hours long. It only felt like four.
While accomplishing what it set out to do on a technical level, “Orientation” and “Jump, Push, Fall” failed the series’ most important objective: doing so while making the series seem fresh again. Instead, we got yet another lumbering opening salvo, where we learned that The Benetrellis & Co. are divided, and about to be conquered yet again.
The devil they know, Sylar, still doesn’t know he’s not really Nathan, but Sy’s old powers have started manifesting six weeks after the events of “An Invisible Thread,” which understandably makes the “Senator” freak out, and Angela freak out even more. Unfortunately for her, a guilt-ridden Big Matt won’t do her a solid and “upgrade” the mental block he installed [insert your own Microsoft Tech Support here, dear readers.] Of course, Matt still won’t tell anybody with experience dealing with metahumans that Sy has started appearing inside his mind at the most awkward times, including an unintentionally (?) hilarious turn at Matt’s rehab meeting.
Even the usually reliable HRG is slipping: he’s too creeped out to even face SyNate and even further estranged from Sandra. He even goes so far as to confess to Danko a desire to “cash out,” before the lawn gnome’s long-overdue murder starts pulling him, Peter and Tracy into contact with a devil they don’t know.
Enter The Mysterious Carnival, led by The Mysterious Samuel. Sam’s Mysterious eulogy for his Mysterious Dead Brother Joseph. As part of his Mysterious Plot – “a line was crossed,” he tells reluctant henchman Edgar – Sam cozies up to Hiro while Edgar jacks Noah (told you he was slippin’) for a Mysterious Compass.
Hiro’s run-in with Samuel comes at the worst possible time: faced with impending death following complications from his powers, Hiro’s increasing desperation (and continued de-evolution) leaves him easy prey for Samuel’s pitch – go back and “right the wrongs” of his life. Hiro’s Bucket List kicks off with something seemingly innocuous: he gets in the way of a slushee that had his sister’s name on it, re-writing canon history so that Kimiko falls for Ando instead of thinking the boys are goofballs – because how could she have gotten that impression, right?
Apparently the only person safe from these messes, is Claire, now studying under her real name at Generically Nice University – thanks, we’re told, to good GED scores. In this case, Annoying Roommate Annie is right on in calling bullsh-t. But as we all know, questioning Claire’s privilege comes with consequences: Annie is found dead not long after kicking ass at Guitar Hero. But as Claire and new uber-creepy would-be bff Gretchen prepare to investigate, we see she, along with Peter and Sylar (?) are next on the Mysterious Samuel’s hit-list. Claire-Bear’s in danger? Matt’s being an idiot? Hiro’s getting duped? Must be September.
The Racialicious Scorecard
Hiro & Ando:Their argument over Hiro’s condition, even with the hand-waving (we still don’t know exactly what damage Hiro’s powers are doing to him), was a nice moment, as was Hiro’s latest encounter with his younger self. But even if he’s distraught, it’s still disheartening to see Hiro can’t know enough to see that when a Hot Topic wash-out knows your name, only bad things can happen.
Mohinder: Who? Just kidding. But his only “appearance” was a name-check from Peter. Rumor has it, though, that he will show up later in the year and that things will get “hairy” for him.
The Haitian: Now we’re talking – his appearance was the only genuine surprise of the whole premiere, a true “OH HELL YEAH” moment. But in true Heroes fashion, he literally disappeared after mind-wiping Danko, which made HRG’s Al Green speech to Tracy look really, really weird. Look, Noah, if you want the rebound, that’s one thing, but don’t pretend your best partner hasn’t been out there watching your back.
Carmen Van Kerckhove is co-founder and president of 
softestbullet wrote:
“Hairy”? Oh god, is it going to be some kind of werewolf thing? Stop covering up Senhil’s pretty face, show!
Posted 25 Sep 2009 at 1:30 pm ¶
7thangel wrote:
dumb ass claire once again revealing her powers, this time to someone who, according to reports, will be introducing her to her mandatory collegiate lesbian kiss. maybe even more. this may keep the girl from being the perp, even if it seems like a predictable twist so often used. apparently danko was supposed to be the first official gay character (?) but they thought better of it as they had plans to kill his ass and didn’t want to fall into yet another trope.
even though ratings are a skewed and flawed measure, heroes tanked
Posted 25 Sep 2009 at 2:08 pm ¶
Lisa J wrote:
Meh, I thought it was half way decent, but maybe that was just b/c it has been so long since I’ve seen it and I built up some immunity to the foolishness. SPeaking of foolishness, I did shake my head about the stupidity of making Sylar into Nate. Stupid, Stupid, STUPID. And Mama Pettreli asking for an upgrade?! Get real.
I felt bad for disliking the obnoxious “roomie” after she died, but I swear I wanted to bitch-slap her from jump! As for the GED thing, I know right after Claire said she got that she said she got good scores but I assumed she was talking about good SAT scores, but maybe I’m wrong, yours sort of makes more sense in the context of the convesation, but the idea of good GED schools getting you into school seemed so far fetched my mind just jumped to the obvious. And while we are on the topic of Claire’s school, what is up with saying it is in Arlington, VA. Except for NOVA (Northern VA Community College) and a few satellites that larger local schools have there , there aren’t any schools, let alone “prestigious” ones of the ilk Ms. Snooty Roomie would go to. George Mason is in Northern VA, but it’s in Fairfax. I mean if they wanted her to be close to HRG then why not show a generic campus and say it is in DC, then people could assume it’s American, or George Washington (if they’ve never seen its all city no quad campus), or Georgetown, or even set it at U. VA, Virginia Tech, or William and Mary, all of which are in a few hours of DC. I mean it isn’t like these folks have never gotten from one place to another fast, and Claire Bear almost always has a car so… ANd what was up with the MOm being there so fast after roomie’s death. I mean I know it was traumatic and all, but she lives in CA. I don’t know, not that it’s impossible but it also shows how little sense the making up a campus in Arlington is, since people can travel and get somewhere suprisingly fast.
As for the Hiro/Ando thing, wouldn’t retconning Ando’s story with Kimiko and having the two be in a long term relationship have changed other things too? I mean, she is so sensible and I wonder if she wouldn’t have freaked when he said he was going off for months at a time with Hiro and all the other wacky stuff they have done? Would Mr. Nokamura (sp?), Sr have allowed his daughter to date such a goofy guy?
I was happy to see the Hatian and thought “Damn I hope they give this man a name this year”. I hope we get some Mohinder and some Micah soon.
To be honest, the only reason I saw it was b/c my DVR was still set to record new episodes, otherwise I’d have never remembered and my first thought when it caught me by surprise by being on my recordings list was, can’t wait to read the Racialicious write-up. Hope you bring back the round-table too.
I really hope this isn’t a season of suck. I think the big networks need to take a page out of the Brit’s page and the page of the AMC, HBO, Showtime and all the others who do short seasons for shows of anywhere from 4-16 episodes for a season. That way they can have more compelling stories, are less likely to get stale and run out of ideas, and they can give more shows a chance to be on the air, plus since they love “reality” tv so much they can vary between reality and shows so that they don’t wind up spending more money. I think if Heroes had been on that sort of short season schedule it would have stayed good.
Posted 25 Sep 2009 at 2:36 pm ¶
Lisa J wrote:
Oh and doesn’t Claire-Bear look ten million years better without that god-awful weave! Lawd have mercy!
Posted 25 Sep 2009 at 3:01 pm ¶
jen* wrote:
I know Claire-bear def said she took the GED, and laughed when she said she just got a really high score – cuz – uh – I thought the GED wasn’t really about scores. I mean – I *took* the GED. And I’m pretty sure way back then it was a pass/fail kind of thing, not really used for college admissions – other than verifying that you’d completed HS. [Yeah there were scores, but the point was to pass - not get a certain score.]
I’m pretty sure they were on the east coast, so I too was surprised about her Mom making it there so fast – w/out Mr. Muggles.
Posted 25 Sep 2009 at 3:42 pm ¶
Mary wrote:
I really admire those of you sticking it out with this show. Even Sendhil’s hotness can’t compel me to watch anymore.
Posted 25 Sep 2009 at 3:47 pm ¶
refresh_daemon wrote:
After the trainwreck of Season 2 and the non-recovery of Season 3, reading this column is probably the most Heroes that I can stand. After reading it, I continue to consider the show a lost cause.
Posted 25 Sep 2009 at 4:32 pm ¶
Tamara wrote:
Hello again, all. Glad to see a review up; can’t wait for the Roundtable.
As I said in the other thread, I liked this premiere. Though I have to agree with Arturo, that it felt really long. The first hour was spent re-stating plot points. Oy. That was a chore to keep from rolling my eyes so much. Anyway, I liked it…even without the noticeable lack of color. Can they PLEASE get back some of these favored characters? Monica, Micah, etc.? Sheesh.
Posted 25 Sep 2009 at 9:07 pm ¶
Jay wrote:
Speaking of Sendhil, he was in a Psych episode last week.
Posted 27 Sep 2009 at 5:44 am ¶
nemogbr wrote:
Sylar should have died by now, instead he is still crawling around.
Hiro and Ando have not developed from the nerdy goofy duo. I would have thought that Hiro would be alot more wordly wise by now and able to kick ass after his timetrip and training.
I’m bored of the series.
Posted 27 Sep 2009 at 8:57 pm ¶
ohsothere wrote:
The whole senator/sylar thing is stupid.
Why didn’t they just use Clares’ blood to bring nathan back to life? They did it for Clares dad when he got shot between the eyes. Why not nathan?
Then Sylar would be gone and they could bring in another character or do some more character development (which this show needs)
This show is becoming another “LOST”
Posted 28 Sep 2009 at 11:09 am ¶