Gratuitous Keanu post

by Carmen Van Kerckhove

While the rest of you have been discussing totally trivial matters like Eurocentric education and government corruption, I’ve been pondering this vastly more important question:

Why is Keanu Reeves splish-splashing with a topless China Chow?

And what are the racial implications of this self-professed “white boy” possibly dating a fellow multiracial Asian?

Cause you know, if he wants to explore his multiracial identity, I can totally help him with that. ;)

Comments

  1. Latoya Peterson wrote:

    if he wants to explore his multiracial identity

    See, I could make a really dirty joke right now…

  2. The Cruel Secretary wrote:

    @ Carmen–handle your biznazz, friend. Just take photos.;-)

  3. Carmen Van Kerckhove wrote:

    “I’d like to explore HIS multiracial identity, if ya know what I mean.” ba-rum-bum!

  4. Latoya Peterson wrote:

    I was thinking more along the line of him probing you for insights but whateves…

  5. Carmen Van Kerckhove wrote:

    Yes, I think he needs to have a long, hard think about his identity.

  6. CEdwards wrote:

    All I can add is “Holla!”

  7. emfole wrote:

    lol im really not sure why you find him so attractive…

  8. patonina wrote:

    Totally up for assisting in that!

    Needed the comic relief reading the past few posts.

  9. Persia wrote:

    Just take pictures, Carmen. Lots and lots of pictures. I think you need to explore his multiracial identity at great length.

  10. superchunk12 wrote:

    Shame on us ladies, all this objectification, but the man is hot.

  11. Jennifer Gandin Le wrote:

    Y’all are cracking me up with these comments. Hilarious!

  12. Minotaar wrote:

    Imagine the conversations!

    Carmen: “Do feminists who address race and racism run the risk of diluting feminism? What is it about Michelle Obama that many Americans find so threatening? Will white people be able to overcome their fear of racial retribution from a black president?”

    Keanu: “Whoa…”

    Latoya: “In a nutshell KBR, like a few other companies, were responsible for providing needed on the ground services in Iraq. In order to get these kinds of contracts, you have to bid for them and show your pricing and an estimated cost for the full job. The government then evaluates these bids and selects the one that will get the job done and save taxpayers the most money. (In theory, that is.) After the contract is awarded, the contractors must submit invoices to be paid. If the invoices are accurate, the payment is processed - if the invoice is incorrect or for a higher amount, the government can stop services and investigate why this is happening. Unfortunately, that’s not quite what happened.”

    Keanu: “Whoa…”

  13. Latoya Peterson wrote:

    LOL @ Minotaar.

    Well, if Carmen gets a hold of him, I think his mouth will be too busy to talk ;-)

    @superchunk12 -

    Well, we could try to be equal opportunity objectifiers…but where’s the fun in that?

  14. The Cruel Secretary wrote:

    @ superchuck12–friend, you ain’t seen nothing yet.:-D

    @ Minotaar–nuh-uhn, don’t let that “whoa” fool you. I heard Keanu has given a spanking to anyone challenging him to a game of chess.

  15. Nadra wrote:

    Seeing Keanu never fails to make me smile! Thank you, I needed that. I don’t know if him playing around with China Chow means much, though. I’ve seen a photo with him hanging out with Lucy Liu and that never amounted to anything. Keanu has also professed to being stunned by Janet Jackson’s beauty, but he’s still a self-professed white boy who usually goes for short-term relationships with white girls, so oh well.

  16. Carmen Van Kerckhove wrote:

    @Minotaar ROFL!

  17. Joseph wrote:

    This conversation is making me feel unsafe.

    ::Pulls blanket up to chin, stares mournfully out the window, tries to hum a little…::

  18. The Cruel Secretary wrote:

    @ Joseph–Oh no, friend! Why are you feeling unsafe?
    You know we Racialicious women (and some fellas, too–cough cough Sewere and BD Wong cough cough) are a rowdy, randy lot, and we’re very vocal about lovin’ up on some menz…

  19. Brigitte wrote:

    Racialicious: After Dark

  20. Manju wrote:

    Hey, whats going on here?

    http://popsugar.com/gallery/540118?page=0,2,0

  21. darleene wrote:

    Manju, the composition of that photo you linked to is just….

    unfortunate.

    Heheh.

  22. HellaKali wrote:

    You know ya boy is multi racial himself. He is half hawaiin or some kind of asian…wiki him..I think youll find it in there. Aint nuthing wrong with multiracially intertwinning though…

  23. sfsinger wrote:

    One of the reasons why I love this blog so much is the unabashed Keanu admiration. I suppose as a Black woman people find it odd that I heart him sooo much but oh well! I actually saw him once up close. He has very porcelain skin and is even better looking in person than on film.

  24. Marsha wrote:

    HellaKali wrote:

    You know ya boy is multi racial himself. He is half hawaiin or some kind of asian…

    OMG- that sort of reminds me of something I saw on “The Family Guy” a few nights ago. Peter has Peter-erotica read on tape by Betty White: “The hot chick–she was Italian…or maybe some type of Spanish?”

  25. Davita Cuttita wrote:

    Ok, this is too much.

    I am seriously dying of laughter right now.

  26. The Cruel Secretary wrote:

    @ sfsinger–”I suppose as a Black woman people find it odd that I heart him sooo much but oh well!”

    Nope, friend, not at all. Fine is fine, and Keanu is one fine-ass man.

  27. Sniper wrote:

    I heard Keanu has given a spanking to anyone challenging him to a game of chess.

    I don’t even know if that was supposed to sound dirty, but it did.

  28. Chris Nathanson wrote:

    woah - pretty HOT, if i was into that sort of thing, i guess. Anyone heard of Klaus pierre and his crazy keanu movies online? That guy is a nut. I have a stronger appreciation for keanu now.

  29. ap wrote:

    keanu is part cherokee, no?

  30. Lyonside wrote:

    Oh, it’s on now, ap!

  31. Megan wrote:

    I’m a Black woman who looovvves Keanu -have done for over 15 years! Glad to see there are more of us out there.
    He refers to himself as a “bougeois white boy” in an early interview…I’ve always wondered why…

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