Intra-Racial Assumptions

by Racialicious Special Correspondent Latoya Peterson

My friend Spiff and I recently spent the greater part of a day at the National Portrait Gallery. I had wanted to check out Let Your Motto Be Resistance before it closed and I wanted to introduce Spiff to the greatness that was Recognize! Hip-Hop and Contemporary Portraiture.

After taking few hours to view and absorb the art, we grabbed a quick cocktail and parted ways. The next morning, I got this email:

I have to share: (If I had my own blog I would talk about this, but I don’t, so…) I was on the Metro on my way home after we parted Sunday, and an older black guy is sitting next to me and strikes up a conversation. I look nice and blah blah blah, am I enjoying the weather? He asks what I’ve been doing out and about today, and I tell him I just came from the museum.

He goes, “Wowww.” I just stare at him blankly; for the life of me I can’t figure out why that should impress him so. He elaborates: “I just don’t see a lot of folks – a lot of young folks – hitting the museum.”

Um…okay, I guess I can see that; I mean, I guess I can kind of understand that without being insulted by it; as if to say, because I’m young, I must have my head stuck up my ass and I can’t possibly spend my time doing anything other than trolling Facebook and practicing my schtick for when I become a reality TV star.

Then he elaborates some more: “You know, especially a lot of black folks…you don’t see…you know…going to the museums.”

Girl, it took every fiber within me not to smack this silly asshole. Because, okay: the young thing, I can get over, but the black thing just…I mean, the element of surprise – from a black man – at the fact that I am a person of color who frequents museums and finds stimulation in a wide breadth of activities, particularly in a city so full of culture…dude, WTF?!? I couldn’t in good conscience go off on him because this was an older dude, 40ish, and he seemed nice enough, seemed to be a bit of a nerd, which I adore…but where he lost me was the supposition that he was the only African-American person “of his kind” – or, excuse me, that he and I were some sort of rare breed, simply because we’re…what, intelligent? Artsy?

Increasingly as I was speaking to him, and trying not to let this fucker have it, I had the strange sensation that if I closed my eyes, I could just as easily be talking to a well-meaning, ignorant white person who was genuinely trying to be nice, but whose compliments were really just backhanded insults.

WHY SHOULD ANYBODY BE SURPRISED THAT I HAVE A BRAIN, TOYA, A CURIOUS, BEAUTIFUL MIND INSIDE MY HEAD, AND NOT JUST EMPTY FUCKING SPACE?

There’s a lot of middle class, um, “upwardly mobile” black people that need to get over this ridiculous fucking notion of a Talented Tenth. I guess that whole idea made sense for its time – although even then, within the context of the Harlem Renaissance, I have a big problem with what it’s suggesting, but…

I dunno, man. I expect more from a brother than such an egocentric mindset. And so hurtful to us, to black people. He’s no better than the white folks that have finally learned to stop saying about Colin Powell or Barak Obama: “Wow, he’s so articulate.” Like, of course I’m articulate, you dumb fucking cunt. What was I, raised by wolves?

On second thought, I guess I don’t score big “articulate” points throwing around phrases like “dumb fucking cunt,” even in the heat of anger

Ciao bella.

~Spiff

Funnily enough, something similar happened to me a few years back. I was on the metro, on the way home from class when an older black man sat down next to me. I wasn’t too frightened as he was apparently the train conductor – I just wondered why he choose to sit next to me. He made small talk for a few moments and then launched into this whole speech about how we, as a people, need to get things together. Then he decides to make his grand point:

“Now you, young lady, we can see that you have the body. You just need to make sure to develop the brains to match!”

Now, that mess would have been insulting, period.

It was more insulting as I was holding a chemistry textbook. I was trying to study before this guy decided to share his unsolicited insight on the state of black America.

What the hell man?

This also happens occasionally with black men I meet. They always seem surprised to find out that I have a brain and choose to use it on a regular basis.

Has this ever happened to you, dear readers? Or did Spiff and I happen across a few very random occurances?