Comments

1. April wrote:

   Excellent podcast. I haven’t been able to listen to you guys for a while due to time contraints on my part. The beginning story was very funny and pitiful (on the man’s part) at the same time. Keep up the great work!

   Posted 26 Oct 2006 at 12:20 am ¶

2. Ann wrote:

   Carmen and Jen.

   Another great podcast!

   I especially liked your lead-in with the anecdote about the aggressive man who would not take “No” for an answer. His change in behaviour spoke volumes about how he must feel towards women of different races. And his persistence in approaching you certainly changed once he found out your racial background. Analysis in point:

   1. Black/Latina women: chase, run, hound them down, as they are not “human” especially the black women in the eyes of many people. Even if they say “No” treat them as if they have no right to say “No”. Show no respect towards their feelings, obviously they have none, so what if you act like you cannot hear what they have to say. Always be aggressive with them; they cannot possibly appreciate being treated with kindness and tact, afterall, they are just black and latina women. Obviously they have no right to expect to be treated as women and ladies.
   2. White/Asian women: just as his behaviour was brash and rude , and just bordering on contempt (and it would be considered contempt) towards you as being a black/latina in his eyes, the moment you said White/Asian, his demeanor changed considerably. Now, it was treat you with respect, become more quieter and considerate of your feelings. Listen to what you had to say and acknowledge it. You are now a woman, a lady in his eyes, whereas earlier, you were not. Earlier you were not someone to be treated with respect and high regard.

   Black women= devalued; treated with disrespect; not listened to
   White/Asian=valued, treated with civility, respect; listened to

   On the “Sexual Stereotypes”, one that I consider insidious towards black men is the “well-hung, stud”. This is nothing but an insult that never ceases to amaze me that black men are so ready to buy into it. It’s no different than saying that they are nothing but rutting, breeding beasts out in the field; no better than saying that as men they are animals walking upright on two legs; no better than saying that they are a walking life support system for a penis. This is what the slave Massa on the plantation had in mind for them, and like the “strong, black woman” insult, this plantation stereotype needs to be left behind with all the other detritus of the plantation.

   You already know how I feel on the strong black woman lie. No need to re-state that feeling. But, I will add that this particular stereotype, especially after your anecdote on the black woman who died of cancer, I believe and know that this stereotype is destroying and killing black women. It is destroying our health, mentally and physically. We are no more mules who should take care of everyone else’s needs at the detriment and neglectof our own, and that is what so many black women have been doing. By buying into this lie, we have shortchanged ourselves of our feelings and humanity, and it has taken a terrible toll on us. Whether put in the back to lift heavy boxes that we cannot physically lift, or doing any other hard work that should not be foisted upon us, we allow our health to be attacked and put our well-being into serious decline.

   High time for black women to abandon this lie that has been killing us inwardly, and outwardly, ever since slavery.

   But then that black woman had every right to have “an attitude” especially since no one gave a damn to think about her feelings, her state of mind, her health.

   On Asian women stereotypes, i.e.,”Dragon Lady/Lotus Blossom”, I would say that my take on that if used to describe black women, would be dragon ladies on the outside (attitude, bitch) in people’s eyes, but once we are allowed to be what we are—women—on the inside, demure, lotus blossoms. At least that is what people think of when they think of black women—that we are not women like everyone else. We are. And in many cases, more feminine.

   It’s just that many men are too brainwashed to see the beauty that exists in black women, inside, and out.

   On “Physical Stereotypes” concerning mixed-race people. BORING. Yawn.

   Mixed-race people are nothing new. They are old news, has-been, been-there, done-that. They are not all that and a bag of chips. Race-mixing has been going on since the dawn of humans. And there is nothing inherently better about mixed-race people than any other race. It’s just that unlike “mixed-race” people of the past, i.e., mixed-blood black Americans, mixed-race people of today can talk out loud about their ancestry, and be able to acknowledge it without fear of racist reprisal. Not that black people in America will willingly want to acknowledge rapist white and/or native american blood. But, black American people are as mixed as they come, so the people of mixed blood born AFTER 1967 are not some new bellwether on the scene. They should thank the black (and white) people who came before them who made it possible for them to claim their mixed heritage.

   There was a time when mixed people could not do this.

   “Sucessful/Intelligence Stereotypes”. Always one of my favourites especially with the insane “Model Minority” lie. There are just as many model minorty black Americans out there: hard-working, law-abiding, and lovers of education. It’s just that the wise white world of America refuses to see that. And I have met many white and Asian people in my life who are dumber than a fence post. So that definately shoots down the lie that all Asians and whites are inherently smarter than anyone else out there.

   “Street smart”. Yeah, right. As if ALL black people live out on the street, in alleys, in gutters, and don’t know what living in a house means. Not every black person in America goes around fighting; not every black person in America fights, at least not physically. Many value their lives too much to endanger themselves so recklessly.

   “Character Traits”.

   Asian=mild-manered, easy-going, highly educated.
   Black=agitated, attitude, hard to get along with.

   There are many easy-going, easy to get along with, highly educated black people out there in the world. It’s just that many people refuse to see this, even when these black people are in their midst. Asians do not own a monopoly on calm traits. Calmness, quietness, reserved bahaviour can be found in all races. Even among black people. That’s if non-black people take the time to see and acknowledge it. Not that hard to to do.

   Just open your eyes.

   Positive stereotypes of white people? Yeah, they abound in excess numbers. Now, negative stereotypes? What would those be for white people?

   White men:
   -poor, inept sexual skills in the bedroom
   -smell like wet dogs
   -mean, hateful towards non-white people , especially black women
   -money-grubbing, money-loving

   White women:
   -cry “rape” at the drop of a hat
   -weak, weak, weak
   -poor cooking/husband skills

   Just goes to show you that EVERYBODY has stereotypes to contend with.

   Time to fight against and shut down all the stereotypes, both positive and negative.

   In the end they do no one any good.

   In the end they are an insult to all people.

   Once again, great show, Carmen and Jen.

   Posted 26 Oct 2006 at 3:14 am ¶

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